Life-Changing Moments Start with Showing Up
Last week, between the constant influx of current news and a workload that never seems to slow down, I wanted to create a space for connection—but without planning yet another event.
As Executive Director of Cincy Girls Who, I’ve spent the past three years bringing women together through breezy meetups and low-pressure gatherings. But with our calendar on a winter break for much-needed mental rest and planning, I wanted to do something different.
This time of year, everything is drenched in red and pink for couples, while “Galentine’s” floods the scene, encouraging women to spend money at events and workshops. I didn’t want to add to the noise. I also knew I didn’t have the bandwidth to plan something elaborate. But I still wanted to create an opportunity for connection.
So, I launched a simple Google Form. No budget, no big marketing push—just a quick post on social media and a few Instagram stories. The idea? Match women with other people in the city for a casual “Galentine’s” friend date.
The Ask Was Simple:
What’s your vibe?
What’s your energy level?
What do you like to do in your free time?
What days are you typically available?
I kept it short because I know how decision fatigue can stop people before they even start. The goal was simple and true to our mission at CGW: reduce the friction and make connection easier.
I had no idea how many women would sign up in just two days. We typically see 70-100 at in-person events, so I assumed it would be around there. I knew people craved connection, but I wasn’t expecting this:
434 women.
That’s 434 women actively looking for a new friend. 434 women taking a step toward something new. 434 women who, in just a few days, will be paired with someone else who feels the same way.
What This Tells Us About Showing Up:
➡ Making friends as an adult is hard. It doesn’t just happen naturally—we have to create opportunities to meet people.
➡ People aren’t just looking for a crowd. They’re looking for that one person—a walking buddy, a coffee date, a new friend who gets them.
➡ We need spaces that prioritize friendships. The same way we invest in dating or networking, we should be investing in meaningful friendships.
And here’s what blows me away:
💡 If 434 women signed up for this, how many more are out there craving connection but feeling too nervous to take the first step?
And what is it about that first step that feels so intimidating?
The Barriers to Showing Up (And How to Reframe Them)
1. Fear of Failure (or Looking Foolish)
"What if no one responds? What if it doesn’t work? What if I embarrass myself?"
Our brains are wired to avoid rejection, which makes the unknown feel risky—even when the stakes are actually low.
📌 Reframe It: What if it does work? What if one small step changes everything?
2. Fear of Being the Only One
When we take initiative, we often feel like we’re the first—and that’s scary.
But look at this match-up. 434 women signed up. People want connection, they just need someone to go first.
📌 Reframe It: You’re not alone in what you want—you’re just the first one willing to act on it.
3. Decision Paralysis & Overthinking
"What’s the best way to do this? Is this the right time? Should I wait until I’m ready?"
The longer we wait, the harder it feels. Overthinking becomes inaction.
📌 Reframe It: Clarity comes from action, not waiting for the perfect plan.
4. Self-Doubt: “Who Am I to Do This?”
"What if I’m not qualified? What if I don’t know what to say?"
We assume someone more experienced should be leading. But leadership isn’t about having all the answers—it’s about showing up and trying.
📌 Reframe It: If not you, then who? You care enough to try. That’s enough.
5. Comfort Zone Resistance
"What if it’s awkward? What if I don’t know what to say?"
Sticking to familiar routines feels safe, even if they’re unfulfilling. But nothing changes unless we step outside our comfort zone.
📌 Reframe It: Discomfort is the price of growth. The hardest part is deciding to go.
Journal Prompts: Showing Up & Taking the First Step
📝 1. What’s something you’ve been hesitating to start?
What’s holding you back?
What’s one small step you could take today?
If fear wasn’t a factor, how would you move forward?
📝 2. Think of a time you showed up for something new.
What emotions did you feel before, during, and after?
What was the outcome?
How can this remind you that showing up is always worth it?
📝 3. Who do you want to connect with more deeply?
Is there a friend or new connection you’ve been meaning to reach out to?
What’s stopping you?
What’s one small action you could take today to start that conversation?
Reflection: Showing up isn’t about being perfect—it’s about taking action, even when it feels small.
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